


I tried but (you don't deserve happiness)

by ChoniToppaz



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, I couldn't get it out of my head so I wrote it, I just have a lot of feelings about Maggie, Mostly about Maggie cheating, Not much Sanvers tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-16 17:14:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10575840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChoniToppaz/pseuds/ChoniToppaz
Summary: "It was strange… After five years, to hear someone scream her name like that, someone other than Emily"





	

**Author's Note:**

> So this is mostly about Maggie and Emily and when she cheated and I don't really know why I wrote this, it just wouldn't leave my head.  
> Also English is not my first language so I apologise in advance for any mistakes this might have.

They were dating for five years. 

They were dating for five years and they were happy most of the time. There were fights and there was yelling but they were happy for most of those five years. 

They met in the last year of college and they were young but they knew how they felt about each other and it was so good, and Maggie was happy for the first time in a long time. 

After two years of dating, Maggie moved to National City to pursue her career as a cop and she thought it was over but Emily was quick to follow her and live with her.

And it was a dream... Because Maggie finally had a home again, a home that she chose to be in, with someone she cared about, with someone that supported her. 

It was good for a long time, and she was happy for a long time. And she finally thought she had found her place in the world and things were finally falling into their places.

But now...

Now Emily was getting distant, and Emily was working more and more and she didn’t mind the extra hours her girlfriend was getting, she really didn’t. It would be too hypocritical of her to care about this. 

But the thing is, it wasn’t like Emily to keep working so many extra hours per week. 

So she knew something was wrong, she knew something was happening. 

But she also didn’t like confrontations, she never did. She hated confrontations because the only time her father confronted her, she ended up being kicked out of her own house. 

So she stayed quiet. And she let her mind wonder to so many dark places. 

Maybe Emily had finally realized she didn’t love Maggie as much as she thought she did. Maybe she was finally done with the way Maggie acted every time the redhead tried to talk about their future and the short woman was quick to shut her down. Maybe Emily finally figure out how broken Maggie really was and there was no point in trying to fix her. Maybe she discovered how replaceable Maggie was, how she deserved better. 

It was a week later after Maggie started to think about how something was wrong in her relationship that Emily came home with the news that she had been promoted.

And Emily was so happy and she was smiling so big and bright and for a second... Maggie forgot all about how weird she had been acting. 

That is... Until Emily’s celebration died down and she went to shower. And her phone rang, and Maggie picked up because it was a normal thing for them to do.

Maggie almost forgot about all their problems, until she picked up that phone. 

Until she heard Emily’s boss asked her if she was going to move to New York with her. 

And then she couldn’t even understand what else the person on the other line was saying.

Because of course Emily was leaving, leaving National City, leaving their apartment, leaving her. 

And suddenly Maggie couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move, couldn’t control her shaking body. She couldn’t stay there, she couldn’t go out and have dinner with Emily and pretend she didn’t know her girlfriend was leaving her. 

She just had to leave. 

So that’s what she did. 

She left, not bothering to let Emily know. She just took her phone and left. 

And she went to the bar and she drank, and every time her phone rang and showed Emily’s name on it, she drank more. 

And she was a little tipsy when that blonde girl sat next to her but she knew what she was doing.

Maggie knew what she was doing when she flirted back. She knew what she was doing when she touched the blonde’s legs and left her hands there. 

She knew what she was doing when she kissed that woman. Maggie knew what she was doing when she agreed to go back to the blonde’s place. 

She wanted to break Emily’s heart before the redhead broke hers. 

Part of her brain was screaming for her to stop. 

Stop kissing her, stop touching her. You have a girlfriend, and you hate cheating. Stop. 

She didn’t stop. She kept kissing her, kept touching her. 

And it wasn’t until she heard her name being yelled when Maggie made the blonde cum, that she actually stopped. 

It was strange… After five years, to hear someone scream her name like that, someone other than Emily. 

“Are you okay?” She heard the woman say. 

“I- I have to go.” She got out of the bed and ignored what the blonde was saying while she put her clothes back on. 

Maggie doesn’t know how she got home, but as she stood in front of the door -at three in the morning, hearing nothing but the sound of the TV playing inside- she didn’t know how to face her soon to be ex girlfriend. 

She was being left behind, and she was hurt but she knew she shouldn't have done what she just did. 

She closed her eyes and silently prayed that Emily was asleep, that she could have a couple of hours before they broke up. 

She wasn’t lucky. 

Emily was waiting for her, sitting on the couch, legs bouncing while she pretended to pay attention on the TV. 

She looked at Maggie as soon as the woman opened the door, and Maggie couldn’t read her eyes, she had no idea what the redhead was thinking. 

“I’m sorry” Emily said, eyes watering just a little bit. “Come sit with me” 

Maggie did as she was told, not able to speak. She would let Emily talk as long as she wanted because she wasn’t ready to tell the redhead what she had done. 

“You weren’t supposed to find out like this, I was waiting for the right moment to tell you.”

“Then why didn’t you?” Now Maggie was angry. “Were you waiting for the right moment to tell you were going to leave me? Is that why you were so distant Emily?” 

The redhead frowned. 

“What? Of course not Maggie!” She sighed, putting her hands on top of Maggie’s, feeling her flinch at the contact but not taking her hands away. “I was nervous babe, I know you don’t like thinking about our future and you’re scared of commitment, and I was so nervous to talk to you but since the cat is out of the bag now” She chuckled nervously. Emily locked eyes with Maggie. “I want you to come with me to New York.” She saw Maggie’s eyes widen, and squeezed her hands. “Look, we already live together in here but we could actually start a life there. You just graduated at the academy, and I can get a much better salary if I accept this promotion. We could get a better house and keep living our life in there.”

Emily tried to read Maggie but it was impossible at that moment. 

“I- Shit Emily.” Maggie’s eyes were filled with tears and she got up, unable to look Emily in the eyes. She started pacing. 

“Nothing’s going to change Maggie.” Emily explained. 

“I-I thought you were going to leave me.” The shorter woman said, already crying. 

“I would never.” Emily said.

And Maggie couldn’t hold her sob.

How could she have been so stupid? Why hadn’t she just waited for Emily to finish her shower? How could she have done such a horrible thing? She was an idiot. 

“Why are you crying?” Emily frowned. Even if Maggie didn’t want to go with her, she knew her girlfriend, she wouldn’t have cried, she would have kept a stoic face and explain why she didn’t want to move out of National City. 

Maggie stopped and took a deep breath. She made a huge mistake and now she had too deal with it. She locked eyes with Emily, her eyes still full of tears.

The next few minutes of that conversation were full of yelling, it was a conversation Maggie fought hard to forget.

“How could you?” Emily screamed while crying and Maggie didn’t even have an answer. She just let the redhead yell at her, she deserved it. 

She deserved every single word that was send her way that day, even if it hurt. 

Emily packed her things fast, saying she would ask someone to get the rest.

“I can’t even look at you right now. I knew you were hard to deal with but you’re so broken that you want you break everyone around you too.” She was already at the door, her eyes cold even if there were tears running through her cheeks. It was the first time she looked Maggie in the eyes since the shorter woman told her what she did, and Maggie couldn’t look back. She was so ashamed of herself. “I really tried to make you happy, I tried so hard to make you feel loved and secure and cared but honestly Maggie you don’t deserve this happiness.” Emily closed the door behind her and left Maggie feeling the weight of her words. 

And Emily was right, she really didn’t deserved to be happy, she was broken and she didn’t deserved happiness because every time she tried to be happy... She ended up screwing things up, and she hurts herself and she hurts people that she cares about.

For a long time, Maggie really believed her ex’s words. 

Until, of course, a Federal Agent with an attitude got into her crime scene and convinced her otherwise. 

Because Alex Danvers was different.

And Alex was patient and Alex never pushed, and she listened.

And Alex loved her even with all of her flaws and traumas. 

And Maggie had never felt so safe and happy as she was whenever she was with Alex.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm accepting prompts for little Sanvers fics 'cause I have a lot of feelings about them  
> Tumblr is detectivessawyer.tumblr.com


End file.
